Dream Chaser 1 - Vindication

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Each of these newfound behaviors reminded us of a truth that we were just beginning to grasp: We were individuals, separate and independent from the company. Our identities were not dependent on the business; our sense of self was based on far more than work. Though this perspective shift took time, the payoff of choosing to invest in things other than work was almost immediate. Ned was able to let go more, delegating responsibilities to others and making new hires.

This empowered his team and lightened his own load. Regardless of whether the business thrives or flails, or we walk away with millions or with nothing, we will still be okay. Because the pressures of being an entrepreneur inevitably push you toward merging your personal identity with your business, you must commit to an ongoing pattern of intentional choices in order to establish a robust sense of self. If you run a business and you are in the early stages of starting your company, you may not see self-identification with the business as much of a problem.

And it may not be—yet.

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But staking your well-being and self-worth on a very unreliable startup will catch up with you at some point. Almost every entrepreneur I know has reached a searing nadir of stress or pain before reaching this understanding. So the earlier in your career that you can establish healthy boundaries between yourself and your company, the more successfully such practices will serve you.


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In addition, regularly stepping away from your company—both physically and mentally—will give you the opportunity to invest in and enjoy other priorities. Consider setting aside at least one weeknight and one weekend day to be free of work. You may also want to pick a space in your home, such as your bedroom or your family room, as a place where you do not discuss work or check your emails.

This gives you the opportunity to practice living apart from your company on a regular basis. And it helps ensure that these regular activities become part of your weekly rhythm—and your sense of who you are. Ned meets regularly with an executive coach, whose primary goal is to help him be as effective a leader as possible. Interestingly, though, this coach leads almost every conversation they have with these two questions: Have you been playing music recently?

He knows, after working with hundreds of executives and entrepreneurs, that living a balanced, healthy life is foundational for long-term professional success. Soon they become addicted to the chase itself rather than rationally evaluating each opportunity as it comes. All their time and energy is taken up with racing after potential breaks. It also creates space in your life to focus on the highest potential work opportunities and to pursue personal priorities outside of the company.

Some entrepreneurs may have difficulty evaluating if an opportunity is worth pursuing or if it requires more than they should reasonably give. If this is the case for you, consider enlisting the help of a mentor or adviser that you can call upon each time a new business prospect emerges. Ask him or her to help you think through the pros and cons of a business opportunity before you devote much time or energy to it. This will then allow you to hand off the tasks that are the most draining for you. In addition to lightening your load, delegating and collaborating will make it clear that the company is not just about you.

Instead, the business is dependent on the efforts of an entire team. The burden to succeed, and the cost of any failure, will then be spread out across multiple people rather than sitting on your shoulders alone.

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This will help alleviate your stress, and give you more options to pursue different opportunities, ideas, or activities that capture your interest. This could be a friend, family member, mentor, or significant other. Their role is to help you remember that you are valued and appreciated outside of what you accomplish or how successful your company is. This person will engage you in discussion topics about things other than work and encourage you to pursue hobbies and recreation that nurture your health and well-being.

He or she can also hold you accountable to setting and maintaining boundaries between your business and your personal life. This is someone who will be in your life no matter what happens with your startup.

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Regardless of whether you succeed or fail, you will still have this relationship as a lifeline to hold on to. If you struggle with defining yourself by your business, what do you do to draw a clear line between your identity and the company? When have you had a hard time doing so? Let us know below. About Dorcas Cheng-Tozun.

Why Running Your Own Business Becomes Personal

Dorcas Cheng-Tozun is a columnist for Inc. This is an incredible, in-depth article. I really got a lot out of it, especially about keeping my identity separate from my business. Thank you!

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Thanks for reading, and best wishes to you in your business! How commercial kingpin Richard Branson got to afford his own island. Get your free print issue. Please log in again. The login page will open in a new tab. After logging in you can close it and return to this page.

Dream Chaser

Skip to primary navigation Skip to content Search Blog. Want to be more productive during your business working hours so you can take more time for yourself? Knowing all this has given us a remarkable sense of freedom in how we live and think.


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  • How to Separate Your Identity From Your Business Because the pressures of being an entrepreneur inevitably push you toward merging your personal identity with your business, you must commit to an ongoing pattern of intentional choices in order to establish a robust sense of self. Establish work-free times and places, and honor those boundaries. Arch; Black, Parry, and Kingsbury; J. Booker; S. Bagster; J.


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